Dear Parents: During this time of stress and change, please care for yourselves well so that your children can feel “calm” and “safety” exuding from you.
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With all the changes in our daily lives because of the coronavirus, and many parents finding themselves at home with kids—either trying to work with kids around, or trying to figure out how to manage the budget with less income—there’s a lot of extra stress and uncertainty.
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And if you’re looking at your kids and thinking, “what is going on with this behaviour?!”, it’s likely because they can feel it.
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What we need most right now is to find out own “well” of calm, deep within, so that our kids can stay regulated through feeling a sense of safety in our presence.
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We can better access our “calm” when we slow down and give ourselves the time we need to stay connected to ourselves.
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Tips that I’m finding helpful for staying calm:
Give yourself permission to do less and be less productive.
It’s tempting to keep going along and expecting the same amount of productivity as usual, without acknowledging that it takes time and energy to gather information to determine what to do in the new world of coronavirus. It also takes a lot of energy, both emotional and physical, to deal with the feelings we have in this uncertainty.
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Get outside into nature as much as possible.
I find that calm centre by going outdoors and taking time to just sit and re-connect with my senses. Sometimes I as if I shouldn’t take the time, because I’m already being “less productive” than usual. However, I know deep within that this is actually a time that I need it more, and when I heed the call as I did this morning when I spent an hour outdoors, my whole day looks different, and I’m able to hold steady and calm for myself and my family.
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Reach out for support if needed.
If you’re feeling anxious or afraid, call a friend who is able to hold steady for you while you share your feelings. Connecting with friends and family is an invaluable resource for helping us stay regulated.
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PLAY!
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What your kids need MOST from you is to feel a sense of safety and calm as they transition into this new “normal”, for however long it lasts.
